The Loved, the Lorn, and the Puffy Chairs
Today I watched a movie. My boyfriend and I actually started it last night, but we were both sleepy and — let’s face it — a wee bit drunk, so we stopped. I finished it tonight, and I’m going to attempt to review it here, with some interspersed reflections based on the novel I’m reading by someone in one of my writing groups which has a similar theme.
The movie is called The Puffy Chair. My first assessment? It was remarkably painful to watch. First of all, the female lead’s name is Emily, and she proved in the first 15 minutes that she was exactly the kind of girlfriend I don’t want to be. Next, her boyfriend Josh proved to be the kind of boyfriend I don’t want. And Rhett, the other main character, proved to be the only redeeming person for me, even though in one particular scene (actually two) I sort of wanted to aim an Uzi at his head.
I think the film had several good qualities. It portrayed a somewhat believable relationship between an insecure woman who was looking for a commitment and a self-absorbed, passive-aggressive man who really wasn’t. Neither of them were able to successfully communicate anything without it turning into a snit or an argument, which I’ve seen in many relationships, so that part was believable. I couldn’t figure out if Emily was just really, really fed up with Josh’s indifference or if she was just really high-maintenance and moody, as one reviewer described her. Either way, I was ashamed when I saw myself reflected in her at all, which I’ll admit happened a couple of times, and I really never want to turn into what I saw there.
To her defense, Josh was entirely incapable of discussing anything serious with anyone, let alone his girlfriend, who he calls “dude” throughout the entire movie — a not so subtle insight into the depth of his emotion. When she asks why he loves her, he can’t think of a single reason outside of her sexy bits (literally — he changes the subject by grabbing her hoohah). Granted, her reaction to his silence is a bit melodramatic, but even so, it shows the dysfunction there. Later on when his brother Rhett calls him out on a pretty despicable action he took, he again gets defensive and nasty.
All in all, I found it really hard to sympathize with any of the characters. They were all completely wrapped up in themselves. They wanted what they wanted when they said they wanted it, and if they didn’t get it, the world ended. I’d give it a C. Maybe even a C-.
I don’t really like dwelling on dysfunctional relationships, but I volunteered to read a book penned by a fellow writer in which the protagonist is an adulterer, and I just read the first six chapters of her rationalizing her affair, which depressed me. Especially after watching that movie.
After watching the movie and reading that book, I got the overwhelming urge to be the best girlfriend ever. I also reflected on my own relationship and came to the conclusion that I am intensely fortunate to have found someone like John, and that despite the similarities between our names and that movie’s characters’ names, we are so not them.
I am so happy with him that it sometimes makes me bubble right off the ground. Which is glorious. So in regards to the title of this blog? I’m that first one. I’m not lorn — love, for, or otherwise — and I’m decidedly not a puffy chair. I’m loved by an extraordinary man.
Take that, cynical world.
Posted on 20 May, 2010, in love, snapshots life, thoughts, Uncategorized and tagged authenticity, communication, dating, happy, honesty, hope, life, love, people, relationships, warm, work. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.